It's amazing how things can change! I was just reading back over some of my blog posts, most of them written in the heat of a moment's pain. How I wrote it, is how I felt that moment. Maybe those thought didn't last longer than that moment during which I wrote it, or maybe that pain they protrayed was a constant in the days surrounding the writing. Alot of them where. But as I look back, I remember the pain of when I wrote those, sometimes written through my own agony of tears, and it makes me smile. Ironic, wierd, strange that it should make me smile now...but the truth behind the smile is, looking back on where I was, makes me so more clearly where I am NOW and where GOD has brought me! Each past post epitamized a feeling of deep loss and pain that was very real, no matter how fickle, silly, over-emotional, or unrational it may have seemed to an unbiased reader. The emotional swings, discovering hidden fears, remember past relationships that I though were long dead - each one of them served a HUGE purpose in bringing me to where I am now. It was a LONG road, a twisting road...but it WAS a road, and a road that God had placed under my feet for me to travel. And so, as I read back and see all the turmoil of emotions that have now ceased to be so constant and so "important," I rejoice that they happened (even the ones that were irrational and rediculous!) because they each played a part in God's workings in my heart, my life, my past, my present, and my future.
God IS good! And what's more - He's MY God.