Naturally, what I'm to "do" now with my life has been on my mind alot lately. Having left behind two relationships when all I've ever wanted to do is get married, gets one to thinking. In light of those failed relationships and the lack of potential for anytyhing linked to marriage happening now, has caused me to start evaluating my life. What DO I do now? Marriage isn't happening. Do I just "hold out" for it, when I don't see God's path taking me that direction in the future that I see right now? What are my options? Ministry? Schooling? Working?
I WANT ministry, especially with young people, maybe even troubled youth - whether through drugs,alcholol, or just poor family lives. That's where my heart has been lately. I see that to truly be an asset in that kind of ministry, being trained/getting some kind of college degree would be hugely beneficial. Not just for the sake of having a degree, but for the help it would enably me to be in a ministry like that. In light of this...should I go to school? I've never really thought I'd go to school...but right now, it seems like a very possible option.
I need the Lord's wisom so much. I know He holds my life - my desires, my singleness, my immediate future, what I DO with my life - and I need His guidance more than anything. To totally change what I've been doing so far would take alot of courage...and money. But nothing is impossible with God. I just need to pray and find out if this impossible is something He desires to make possible.