Monday, August 13, 2012
Monday ~ Running
The sun is just rising when I get out of bed to go on my 6:15am run. I throw on my shorts, t-shirt, and running shoes, grab my phone and ipod and head out the door. I run alongside of an almond orchard, behind which is where the sun in slowly rising. This morning as I was out for my run, I happened to actually look over and up through the trees, and I think maybe I gasped out loud. I'm a sunset kinda gal, but I'll say this: it's the sunrise that beats the sunset for it's golden rays. I know I've seen sun-rays before, but for some reason, this morning it was especially beautiful. You can only just barely see them in this inadequate phone glimpse. It was marvelously perfect.
Maybe it was extra beautiful because I'm learning to see Jesus differently. More approachable. More clearly. More perfectly able. More and more the God I want to give all my life to. I appreciate so much Emily Freeman's book "Grace for the Good Girl," which, as you know, I've been reading. One concept in particular has been extremely difficult to grasp, but I believe it's been at the base of alot of my spiritual struggles. I'll let you just read my journal entry from last night:
"Our spiritual disciplines, such as reading and memorizing the Word, prayer and talking to God, do not draw us any closer to the throne of God. Rather, it unblinds our eyes to show us we are already there. As Christians, we already rest in the very closest place at Jesus's feet, our position won for us on the Cross. If we had to have quiet times or do spiritual things to come into closer proximity to God, then His death on the Cross wasn't enough to grant us His full presence. Therefore, NOTHING we do propels us any closer to God. It only opens our eyes to see His already-there nearness more and more."
After really grappling with the idea of me having continual favor with God (even when I sin) and still feeling that I must do something to be granted a closer fellowship with Christ, I've finally been able to slowly relinquish my part, my job, my doings. And those spiritual disciplines that we do, such as reading, memorizing, meditating, worshiping, praying, etc, are not my ticket to a closer position at His feet, but the means of the scales being lifted off of my eyes, allowing me to see Christ's nearness, and in that way, know Him and be known by Him more and more. It's really changing everything about me.
By the way, I promise this blog is not going to become the "pictures I took on my phone" blog. But the way I see it, if it captures the moment, even if it's poor quality, it's a good picture. :)