Saturday, June 8, 2013

Saturday ~ How Friday's Bad Hair Day Showed Me Jesus




“Wow…you look…really...frazzled.” 

It wasn't so much the exact words he said, but the way he said it, the look on his face as he looked at my hair and the way his hands were making strange gestures around his face that brought to mind one of those black and white images of Einstein, whom we all know for his radical cosmetology skills.

Ok, so I knew my hair was, well, just a little bit edgy yesterday. I’d thrown it up in a messy bun right before going to bed the night before and seriously, why is it that your pre-bed hairstyles always look amazing and your morning attempts fall so flat? Anyways, I’d rolled out of bed the next morning, took a quick inventory, tucked in a few extra bobby pins (women's answer to ducktape!) and wore that baby to work. Yah, I know. Life on the edge.

Now, this guy’s been a great friend of mine for years, we go way back and I have a huge respect for him. But wow, he gets a glaring ZERO for tact. Because he didn’t mention my hair just that once. No, he mentioned it twice and the second time was even more insensitive and insulting. In front of another guy coworker. *collective gasp from all the women reading this*

Girls, I was embarrassed. I don’t blush easily, but I felt my face turning into a fiery inferno right there as I sat in my office chair with all of his 6 foot everything  towering over me in the doorway of my office. If someone had handed me nightlock berries I would have eaten then right there.

Anyways, he eventually left my office and like a little oversensitive girl who’s had her braid pulled by a boy in school, I started tearing up and getting a runny nose (which I’m sure did not help the overall fashion ensemble) and seriously considered taking my desk scissors to my hair and just being done with it. Or at the very least, somehow manage to reform my hair into something less reminiscent of what I imagined must look like a Helen Bonham Carter. But the ladies bathroom was all the way on the other side of the building and I’d have to walk past other people to get there, people who would probably barely be concealing their horror as the bride of Frankenstein came trolling down the hallways towards them.

But after a moment of water-eyed, nose stinging shame, I plucked up the remainder of my dignity and made it to the bathroom. Where I tore down that ill-fated messy bun (which hey, really look fine! It was cute and hip, really! Trust a guy not to see it!) and went the polar opposite by forcing it into a conservative bun at the nape of my neck. Then I shut myself in the bathroom stall and cried.

It’s true, I probably over-reacted (okay, yes, I did), but maybe I’m just a wee bit sensitive about guys’ opinions. And seriously? Having a guy so brutally point out flaws in your appearance (twice!) is enough to damper the self-worth of any girl.

But you know, God has a lesson in everything (even the mindless insensitivity of a coworker) and with His lessons, there comes His affirmation, too. As I leaned against the wall rail aching my bruised little heart out over something that was actually (sorta) laughable, God still saw the genuine hurt it had caused me and He came into the Ladies Bathroom there with me and told me He loved me, bad hair day and all. He really did. He reminded me that what others say really isn’t important, that His love is my identity and His love and affirmation of me is enough. It was like a little snuggly blanket of His presence making me feel like I was still beautiful even though this guy had told me I looked dimwitted (refer to Insult #2).

So, this tragic tale does have a happy ending after all and even though maybe I won’t ever try wearing my bed-head to work again…at least I got to feel a little bit of God’s extra-nearness today because of it. I’ll settle for that any day. 

And I may or may not have gotten a tiny bit of revenge by drawn attention to the fact that his hair is starting to thin on the top. But that wasn’t very nice of me, so I shouldn’t brag.

20 comments:

  1. I'm right there with you girl! I've had days where my hair has gotten the wow, your hair is so..um..big today.....and I may have cried about it, but I am sooo over it now....yeah, sure....I don't care at all! =P

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    1. Lol, KatySue! You are indeed a kindred spirit to me! And for the record, I like big hair. :)

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  2. You always know something is up when they don't look right at you when they talk....but slightly above your eyes. :)

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  3. Oh.Gosh. That was kind of rude of him to say that. :P Messy buns are 99% of the time cute & casual & flattering. {I wouldn't know because my hair's short--but my sister pulls them off well & I'm sure you do too!}

    Our Jesus is amazing...it blesses my heart to see how He spoke to your beautiful soul, my friend. <3

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    1. Yes!! And I wear messy buns every bit of that 99% of the time, so I'm still not quite sure why that day's messy bun was something out of the ordinary enough to make him comment, since that's the #1 hairstyle I wear to work. Oh well, what I really loved most about the whole (silly) situation was how the Lord didn't let me keep believing that I looked terrible. He's a good God that way. :)

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  4. Um, messy buns are always the way to go. Doesn't that co-worker of yours know that? Seriously, they're the best and you can never go wrong with one (same goes for more bobby pins! My thick hair needs lots of those guys!). I also have to agree that there's some magic in evening hair--I'm telling you. Anytime I do my hair at night it comes out 100 times better than anytime I try to do my hair before I actually leave the house.

    I also couldn't agree with you more on Jesus' love. It's hard times like these that I'm reminded that Jesus' love is the way to go. Thank goodness His love NEVER fails. And I'm so glad He came to your rescue, showered His love on you, and that you felt it, too. I have been really loving your heart, friend!

    And I'm going to say that I loved that little ending to your post. That part made me laugh. :)

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    1. LOL! He should know that, since I honestly wear messy buns about 99% of the time so the other day was NOT the first time he'd have seen me sporting one (nor the last!). Maybe he was just having a bad day of his own and needed to feel better about himself somehow and me and my messy bun was just the scapegoat. :)

      My favorite part, though, was how even in something as SILLY and small as this, that God still comforted me and spoke worth into my heart. Love Him. :)

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  5. :)
    thought 1) hair always looks better when you aren't going anywhere and you aren't trying to make it look good. thought 2) :( I'm sorry you had to go through that Kelz. thought 3) God is good.

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  6. Leave it to a guy to make a comment like that when you already are feeling a bit insecure about your hair. <3 Its pretty sweet how Jesus quiets our little hearts with His love in the smallest moments. He really does care about every detail of our life.

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    1. And that's EXACTLY what has stuck me with - not the actual "insult" itself, but how the Lord treated it as IMPORTANT and how He really did speak His overwhelming affirmation into my heart! That's what I remember about the whole silly situation. :)

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  7. Ugh...yeah...why is it whenever you TRY to make life easier with the easiest hair...it decides to be a pain??! Boys are dumb. That's all I can say about that. Dumby boys. :P As usual, your blog post was still lovely! <3 *hugs*

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    1. Haha, and I must confess that I shot off a text to one of my friends swearing off the institution of males altogether right after that happened. ;)

      But God is good and I love how He saw my silly, wounded feelings as important, even over something as small as an insult about my hair, and still came to my rescue. He's good that way. :)

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  8. Ah, so true. MY EMOTIONS! (okay, sorry about the caps lock) Anyway, boys are silly. But what I've discovered is that I'm silly too! Like you, there have been comments made or things I imagine others are thinking and I proceed to analyze it around and around in my head. Until I'm one giant tangle inside that makes no sense whatsoever. I completely forget that God loves me no matter what. I also forget that other people (note: mostly girls) get emotional about such little things (that feel big in the moment!) and that I'm far from the only one who does this. So thanks for the reminder that I'm not weird! :)

    Also, I bet you really did look awesome that day and that guy was just a....a....insert whatever nice insult you can think of. :D

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    1. LOL, thank you, Kara! I really don't think my hair looked bad, although yes, probably wearing the same messy bun I slept in wasn't my BEST choice. Just a note to self that messy-buns should be worn afresh in the mornings. ;)

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  9. Right there with you, Kellie! Believe me, I have bad hair days ALL THE TIME! I mean, I practically live in messy buns. It works so why not use it!? ;) And, oh-my, if my bangs need to be trimmed or I've gone overlong before washing my hair, they look awful! Believe me, I've gone out and about in such a state. Don't think I've ever had anyone tell me I look horrible save for family and they do it lovingly. :) That wasn't one of those nice insults from your co-worker. He should be ashamed! Guys, what do they know!?

    Guess we can be comforted by the fact that "messy" is "in." ;)

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    1. Same here - messy buns are what I do pretty much every single day of my existence! And it certainly was NOT the first time I wore one to work - I do that like every day. :)

      In his defense, I think he really was just CLUELESS that it was hurtful. We tease each other a lot in our conversations, so he was probably (maybe?) just trying to tease me but....but it really didn't work for me. :)

      Oh well. Being a fan of the messy bun, I can take on more for the cause. ;)

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  10. I think it's nice that Jesus can just walk into a Ladies Bathroom like that and talk to us. He probably didn't feel a twinge of awkwardness. :)

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    1. Hehe, nope, He didn't. Neither did I. *wink wink*

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